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‘Sir, You’re Scaring the Children’: Fugly Internet Transes Gone Wild!


May 27, 2023

Let us showcase the wildest transes in their natural habitat: cancerous social media. This exhibition is best consumed on an empty stomach, ideally with an antacid at the ready.

To to pain!

“Your ears you keep and I’ll tell you why. So that every shriek of every child at seeing your hideousness will be yours to cherish. Every babe that weeps at your approach, every woman who cries out, ‘Dear God! What is that thing,’ will echo in your perfect ears. That is what ‘to the pain means.’ It means I leave you in anguish, wallowing in freakish misery forever.
-The Princess Bride

Creatures from the black lagoon give birth too, bigot!

This monstrosity with the purple hair wants her viewers to remember that women aren’t the only humans who give birth, defying all previously established biological science to deliver her postmodern fact-check.

The cringest LGBTQ+++™ family in recorded history

Next up, we meet a whole family of transes raising the next generation of fugly LGBTQ+++™ transhumanist creatures – a duo of apparent men living as women, their shared lover, a woman with a butch haircut playing the role of man of the house, an “antegender” baby, and a 10-year-old non-binary named Sparrow.

Because these people are so ridiculous, it’s literally impossible to separate the actual sincere videos from the satirical parodies.

What is happening here is not loving and liberal at all. What is happening is psychological damage that Sparrow is probably going to spend tens of thousands of dollars remedying with recreational/pharmaceutical drug use and psychotherapy when he comes of age.

‘Look what you made me do, Dad!’

The subtext of this obese Zoomer edgelord just screams “f*** you, dad!”

As part of the transes’ rhetorical double-bind technique, they claim simultaneously that they are normal people who want to be treated as such and that they’re incredibly special unicorns who deserve all kinds of special set-asides. To that latter end, they seem to go out of their way to look as demonic as possible.

Compare to the propaganda below, which would have you believe that transgenders just want to blend into society. They are just normal people like everyone else, even when they go out of their way to look as atypical and inhuman as possible.

Gorloch the Destroyer

This one, Gorloch the Destroyer, recently took the internet by storm.  The creature is obviously huffing the copium here by describing himself as a “certified bad bitch.”

“What does that mean?” the podcast host follows up.

“It’s just a lifestyle.”

Gorloch is what the illegitimate lovechild of Mr. Potatohead and Ursula from The Little Mermaid would look like.


It’s very difficult to make out the telltale facial structure through all the fat, but Gorlock is indeed a transgender. He would surely frighten the pants off of schoolchildren if he appeared to read them transgender propaganda for Drag Time Pedophile Story Hour.

Viscerally revolting trans describes its threesome last night, says you’re jealous

The trans below understands, of course, that all the conservative haters (you) are just jealous because she was having a hot threesome last night while you were stuck at home with your Bible or whatever.

Super edgy.

They’ll rebel to anything.

“You don’t mean it
You need a uniform
So you won’t be ignored
You are affected
And so you’re accepted
It’s time you invested in a bottle of poison
So we don’t have to hear about you bitchin and moanin
You think you could afford a fuckin bottle of asprin
Boo fuckin hoo you’re not the only one whose live’s a piece of shit
And yet miraculously somehow we all seem to deal with it
Did anybody think that you would really seriously slit your wrists
In fact I think that everybody thinks you’re seriously full of shit”
-Mindless Self Indulgence, You’ll Rebel to Anything

Trans-identified, blue-haired man describes ‘shenis’ as ‘birth defect

This little freakshow describes his penis (his “shenis”) as a “birth defect” that presumably must be remedied through surgery and drugs. This is an excellent exemplar of the psychological damage caused by medicalization in which normal, healthy behaviors and physical features are pathologized so as to offer a (costly) medical solution.

These people are unwitting walking shills for the pharmaceutical and medical industries, all the while posing as rebels against the establishment Patriarchy or whatever. It’s a delusional inversion of reality.

Towering trans man berates elderly lady for ‘misgendering’ him

Because they are groomed to become righteous victims in public school, the transes feel full license now to berate anyone in public who doesn’t fully affirm their delusions.

What’s the cringest LGBTQ+++™ video you’ve seen lately? There is surely no shortage of them floating around the ether. Link yours in the comments!

Ben Bartee is an independent Bangkok-based American journalist with opposable thumbs.

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‘Sir, You’re Scaring the Children’: Fugly Internet Transes Gone Wild! was first posted on May 26, 2023 at 7:05 pm.
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